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arses!

I was going to start out just writing the top question for Cat, to be all helpful.

But then I went mad ....

Poll #317075 randomosity again

Question for Cat - is someone more likely to love / like / fancy you if ....

.... they bombard you with calls?
2(50.0%)
.... they're too afraid to call at all?
2(50.0%)

Who's fatter?

Bikki
0(0.0%)
Rikki
1(25.0%)
How am I supposed to know?
1(25.0%)
Who the fuck is Rikki? In fact, who's Bikki? Who did I wake up next to this morning? ARG!
0(0.0%)
Why do you care? Weight doesn't matter. Be proud of your fat! You're FLABULOUS!
2(50.0%)

Isn't shopping just the greatest thing, like, ever?

YES!!!
2(50.0%)
I have yet to find something better, but I'm keeping an open mind.
0(0.0%)
Shopping's good, I guess, but there are things I prefer.
0(0.0%)
I don't shop any more cuz I'm broke.
1(25.0%)
Erm .... how about no?
1(25.0%)
Stop yourself, Becke! God will save you from this materialistic addiction of yours!
0(0.0%)
God? What the fuck?
0(0.0%)
Did you know that Jesus had a mullet?
0(0.0%)
We've gone completely off topic.
0(0.0%)
I think I'll go shopping now.
0(0.0%)

What's the bestest place?

Frome
0(0.0%)
Bristol
2(50.0%)
Canterbury
0(0.0%)
Manchester
1(25.0%)
Weymouth
1(25.0%)

Can you keep a secret?

Yes. I'm so good at keeping secrets because I completely forget everything .... erm, what was the question again?
0(0.0%)
I'll keep a secret. I'll just laugh at it by myself.
3(75.0%)
I tell someone and tell them not to tell anyone. Then they'll tell everyone, the bastards.
0(0.0%)
No! I'm shit at keeping secrets. I can't keep a secret to save my life! Don't tell me anything! Unless it's juicy, of course.
0(0.0%)
I'll keep it to myself, until I get on that plane from Scotland to London and then I get scared and blab it to some rich bloke named Jack.
0(0.0%)
Hey, isn't that what happens in that Sophie Kinsella book which ownz?
0(0.0%)
Becky Bloomwood ownz over Emma Corrigan any day.
0(0.0%)
Bristol ownz over everything.
0(0.0%)
No, shopping does!
1(25.0%)
No, Rikki's fat does! He's FLABULOUS!
0(0.0%)

How many sugars in your tea?

I don't drink tea (you WEIRDO!)
0(0.0%)
One
0(0.0%)
Two
2(50.0%)
Three
2(50.0%)
My name is Chris Pardoe
0(0.0%)

What's better, tea or sex?

TEA all the way! Sex comes and goes (ha ha yeech) but tea will always love you!
2(50.0%)
Fuck off, who'd want a cup of tea when there's lurve to make?
1(25.0%)
Neither, I'm a celibate weirdo.
0(0.0%)
Can I have both?
1(25.0%)
Can I go shopping instead?
0(0.0%)

What turns you on?

Sex
1(25.0%)
Tea
0(0.0%)
Shopping
0(0.0%)
Mullets
1(25.0%)
Sexy tea-drinking shopaholic mullets (call me please)
0(0.0%)
Jelly
2(50.0%)
Topless jelly-man
0(0.0%)
Busted
0(0.0%)
My boyfriend
0(0.0%)
My girlfriend
0(0.0%)
All my boyfriends and girlfriends
0(0.0%)
My dog
0(0.0%)
The person I fancy
0(0.0%)
Chris's mum
0(0.0%)
How dare you ask such an intimate question?
0(0.0%)

Is there a problem with your computer?

Erm .... no ....
2(50.0%)
Yes - blame easywww!
1(25.0%)
Yes - blame Canada!
1(25.0%)
Yes - blame Janet!
0(0.0%)
Yes - blame Chris's homosexuality issues!
0(0.0%)

Say something.

.... say something, anything, I've shown you everything ....
0(0.0%)
I like James, I really do. Do you know James? Can I meet them?
1(25.0%)
This poll has been flabulous!
0(0.0%)
No it hasn't, it's been FAT .... no wait, that's the same thing isn't it?
0(0.0%)
Hey, weren't you meant to be concentrating on Rikki's good points?
0(0.0%)
JAB THE BUILDER, can he fix it? JAB THE BUILDER, yes he can!
0(0.0%)
Hey, isn't Charlie the builder?
0(0.0%)
Stop complaining, you annoying little fuckwit.
0(0.0%)
We like tha moon!
1(25.0%)
We like to moon! (!?)
2(50.0%)

- b.k. x

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